First, let me apologize. I feel like I’m ranting, again. But I didn’t know what to post tonight, and I just came across this, and it pissed me off, so here you go.
Where do people get this shit! I found this on YourTango.com (whose tag line is Smart Talk About Love), which I get daily emails from. Sometimes it has interesting articles, which can help to spark my imagination on upcoming posts. Today was not one of those days. I was rummaging through my emails tonight, and I see an article titled “She’s Doing Threesomes & He’s Doing Lonesome.” And I instantly thought about my threesome series and thought it may be interesting to tag. And then I started reading it…
It begins with a question from a dude who doesn’t trust his girlfriend, as she spends too much time with people she used to fuck, not date, just fuck. He’s particularly upset, because a “friend,” he doesn’t state if it’s male or female, who she had a threesome with before is spending the night at her home.
The “expert,” Nina Atwood, whose response begins by talking about how the relationship has a lot of “red flags” and continues with “…it’s not okay to have threesomes, and it’s not okay to have someone you once had a threesome with spend the night with you while you blow off your boyfriend. It’s not okay, that is, if you want a committed relationship that is built around love and fidelity.”
Okay, I understand that sex is different for everyone. And that my thoughts and feelings are perhaps a little more promiscuous than most. Or maybe it’s just I’m a little more willing to admit it and talk about it. But what the fuck. Who says it’s not okay to have a threesome? I guess threesomes are not the “norm,” but it’s not like they are uncommon to at least think about, as everyone always says they are a man’s number one fantasy. And I know they are quite up there on my list, too.
And, I get that you may not want a guy who used to fuck your girl spending the night at her house. But the way it read, it seemed to me that her friend was a chick. And lots of girls have threesomes with their friends (okay, maybe not a ton, but I bet in a lot of FFM, the girls were friends). The girl that was in my threesomes is still my best friend. And we haven’t fucked around in over 10 years. And I really don’t ever see us fucking around again. She was my maid of honor, and I will be her’s next fall. I still talk to her almost everyday. And, before her guy moved in, if I was staying at her house, we slept in the same bed. And we didn’t have sex.
I guess my point is it’s not always about sex. It’s about friendship. And sometimes sex just happens. It doesn’t mean it will always happen. And if any guy thought he could tell me that I couldn’t see my friend, I think I’d tell him to fuck the hell off. Even if it was a “committed relationship built around love and fidelity.” Dumb bitch. Trying to spread vanilla to the people of the world.
Then she continues, saying,”If you don’t have any sexual boundaries yourself, you can’t expect your partner to have them. But if you do have morals…” Her chain of thought is if you have had a threesome, or hang out with someone who you had sex with before, then you have no sexual boundaries. And if you have no sexual boundaries, you have no morals. So, if I have engaged in consensual, adult sex, and it either involved three people, or I still have these people in my life, I have no morals. God, I fucking hate people! And just so you know, I’m trying really hard not to quote out of context. This is literally two lines down from the last quote.
Then, she turns the post into a religious monologue, saying “Here’s the reality: Sex is about three things: procreation, connection, and pleasure.” Ahhh… Now I understand. You want us all to have lots of babies that we can’t afford in a world that is already over crowded. I get it. Geez, you’d think Michelle Dugger fucking wrote this. She talks about how the only reason we have the desire to have sex and receive pleasure from it, is because of procreation. And I don’t disagree. But just because it developed that way (she uses the word “create”), doesn’t mean that is the only way to use it. After all, opposable thumbs allowed for tool making, does that mean that they can’t be used for video games?
She ends with “But over time, the “sex without love” person becomes emotionally numb, cut off from the ability to attach and form a lasting commitment.” The only thing that I have to say to that, lady, is that if your “committed relationship” focused on “love and fidelity” with all your “boundaries” and “morals” leaves you emotional satisfied but dry as a desert, then I’ll take “emotionally numb” and my lack of “sexual boundaries” for a dripping pussy.
And people wonder why we are still a sexually repressed society.