Every once in awhile, I get an email from a reader looking for advice, and often times it’s about how to ask for D/s or add some BDSM to the bedroom. While I’m not necessarily an expert, I’ll offer my advice when I can.
Tag Archives: Power Exchange
In the last year, I’ve downsized my book collection by at least 60%. The last time I purged, one of the books in the pitch pile was Mars and Venus in Touch by John Gray (the guy who wrote Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus, just in case that wasn’t obvious). I flipped through the book, skimming it for anything I might find interesting, and I stumbled upon what Gray calls “The primary love needs of women and men.”
It seems to me I’ve read a lot about struggling with your submission. Seems rather common.
And there are all sorts of things submissives struggle with. Always feeling like you could do better, that you are not submissive enough. Turning into a brat when things don’t go your way or you want to act out *one of the most common things you’ll find*. Becoming frustrated with things are not going the way you want to, or moving fast enough for you. Trusting in your Dominant. Giving in. The list goes on and on.
*Disclaimer: This post may piss a few of you off. That’s not my intent. This is meant to be more of a “these are my thoughts, what are your thoughts.” So if this pisses you off, please tell me what your thoughts on the matter are. I seek to understand…*
Ok, so I gave in, and interestingly enough, decided to read the second 50 Shades (much better than the first, mind you), but at the beginning of the book, I was struck by something I don’t think I mentioned before, and found myself compelled to write this, while sitting at the garage, waiting for my car to get inspected.
Over the weekend, I was doing some back reading, still catching up on blog posts that I haven’t had time to get to. I was over at Leather Cuffs and Silken Bonds and reading this post by Jake, and it got me thinking. I’ve talked about this briefly, here and there, since the big blow out with M occurred over six weeks ago, but I don’t think I’ve really discussed it in detail, or really explained what I meant by it.
I don’t really want to be, but sometimes it just comes out of me. Being new to the whole BDSM thing, especially as a mainstay in our lifestyle, is pretty damn interesting, to say the least. And the first month has been fucking fantastic. But damn. Sometimes this shit just pours out of my mouth, well before it hits my brain. As soon as I hear myself say it, I’m like, “Wtf LSAM! Are you even thinking?” And most of the time it’s stupid shit. Dumb, bratty shit.
I’ve stumbled upon this a few times now, and although I have a few posts started, nothing is ready tonight. And, being since it is Sunday and hence, stealing is allowed, I thought why not pass it on. From what I could find, the original author is unknown. The italics are my additional thoughts on the matter, just because I felt like chirping in.