Last Longer

It happens.  You’re really excited.  It feels really good.  She’s moving and moaning.  And suddenly, you can’t hold back anymore.  Damn.  She didn’t even cum yet.  She says it’s okay, but you know it’s not.  Now you feel like a douche.  But wait, this doesn’t have to happen again.  There are some quick, easy tricks to use to help you last longer.

Focus on Her

Spend some time on her.  Touch her.  Kiss her.  This way she’s already excited and when you do start having sex, she’ll be more likely to enjoy it, even if it is quick.  Get her off before you fuck.  Anyway you can.  Eat her out, finger fuck her, use her favorite toy, but make sure she’s came before you penetrate her.  This way, even if you do cum quicker than you’d like, she’s already had an orgasm and won’t be resentful that you got off and she didn’t.

Keep Her Away From your Junk

While you’re fooling around during foreplay, don’t let her handle your package.  It will be natural for her to go that way, so you may have to put her hands in other places, but if she is not stimulating and stroking you, you won’t be as hot and ready when you’re finally inside her.  This will give you some more time once the sex actually occurs.

Change Positions

Move around a lot while you’re fucking.  Go from missionary, to cowgirl, to reverse cowgirl, to side by side, to doggy.  Whatever it takes.  When one position starts to feel too good, switch to something else.  It will take a little bit to get the momentum going again and will give you a bit of a break, slowing down your orgasm.

Utilize Your PC Muscles

These are the same group of muscles that you use to stop peeing when you’re urinating.  If you “pulse” these muscles while having sex, it will slow down your climax.  This may take some practice, but once you get the hang of it, you can do it again and again during one bout of sex.  And when you do cum, it will be MUCH stronger and more pleasurable.  As a side note, you should try to exercise these muscles regularly, and you will gain more control of them.  Talk to just about any woman who enjoys sex, and ask her about her Kegels (the exercises that help strengthen her PC muscles).  She very well may tell you she does her exercises at least once a day.  She may say she’s doing them right now.  I know I am.

Think About Baseball

I know that it’s a cliché, but, really, think about baseball.  Or meatloaf.  Or Meatloaf.  Or your garden.  Or whatever it is that can take your mind away from all the feel good that’s going on around your cock.  This is not necessarily a good long-term solution, but it can sometimes get you through the moment.

Masturbation

When you masturbate, don’t cum as quick as you can.  Remember what your football coach used to say, “You play like you practice.”  If you are cumming in two minutes when you jack off, this can easily spill over into your sex life.  Think about this next time you masturbate, and slow it down.  Bring yourself to the point where you want to cum, then back off.  Do it again and again and you will develop the skills to do this when you’re fucking your girl.  Try to reach at least 15 minutes, because if your fucking for 15 minutes, you are NOT a two-pump-chump.

Touch It

While your fucking, if you get to the point where you think you’re going to climax, pull out and squeeze your cock right below the head.  This

English: masturbation masc. Español: masturbac...

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should put some pressure on your urethra, and push back your ejaculation.  It will force the blood back out of your dick, allowing you to delay your orgasm.  It may also help if you gently tug on your balls, pulling them away from the body, as they tend to pull in right before you cum.

Final Thoughts

Okay, so obviously, this is not something that I necessarily have to worry about, as I can cum as much as I want and it doesn’t matter.  It’s actually encouraged.  Any men reading this, please add your suggestions to the comments, as you know better than I do.  But this is my last piece of advise for tonight.  If you do cum quick, don’t stress too much about it.  This will cause a downward spiral, and may even lead to difficulty getting it up.  So lay back, try some of these strategies, make sure she cums first, and work together on finding the right solution for you.

16 responses to “Last Longer

  1. Masturbation can be a double edged sword with PE. If you get too used too good at it you might have problems cumming with a pussy, mouth, ass etc.
    I’ve never had success with the squeezing thing. I’ve never suffered from PE (being an excessive wanker, if anything I have the opposite problem) but when playing with ejaculation delaying games, squeezing just hasn’t worked.
    And for me, tugging on my balls has the opposite effect to the one you describe – it makes me cum quicker.
    My point is, as with all aspects of sex, what works for one person won’t work for the next. So play around and find out what does.

  2. I concur with your assessment Accidental Masturbation. That as with all aspects of sex, what works for one person won’t work for the next. So play around and find out what does. But at the same time, I do believe and will try the tricks suggested above. I’m a married man, and my entire life, I’ve suffer from PE, don’t even remember when it all started.

    It has affected my marriage, as well as my life, and this year I made a decision to do whatever it takes to find the root cause. So thank you so much for sharing.

  3. Thank you both for responding. I agree that what works for one person may not work for another. Hell, what works for one person today might not work for that same person tomorrow. Play around and figure out what works for you.
    And Accidental… I had never heard of the ball thing, but a friend of mine was with me while I was writting and she suggested it, as that’s what works for her husband… But I think it would probably make M cum as well, especially if he was really close.
    And Year… I wish you luck on your venture to find a “cure.” Keep trying! 🙂

  4. You know, as a woman I loathe the idea that my male partners must “hold back” until I come. I’d really rather them have a rollicking good time and take care of me later. Why? Because A) knowing he’s holding back puts pressure on me to “hurry up and come” — and nothing scares an orgasm away more thoroughly and more importantly, B) it’s all part of the widespread cultural notion that a woman’s sexual experience has to fit inside the “envelope” of male sexual experience — that my pleasure and satisfaction have to happen some time between the time he gets an erection and the time he ejaculates, and that a “good” male partner “holds back” so “she can come too.” Um, no: I don’t want all of my sexual pleasure to be defined by the arousal timeline determined by male biology.

    • Lily, Thanks for the comment. 🙂 And I agree with you to an extent. If a woman feels pressured to have an orgasm, it very well may cause her to not be able to climax at all. The idea behind the post was not necessarily about having to get your girl off before you cum, but more about the guy who has PE or cums well before he wants to once penatrative sex starts. I think that many men want their girls to cum (at least I hope so) and feel some type of way (embarrassed, undeserving, sad, upset, angry with themselves, etc) if this does not occur, especially if the actual sex is short. It hurts their ego. And when their ego gets bruised, it makes them more self-conscious going into it next time, which can just add to the problem, creating a never ending cycle. So, if she is able to achieve orgasm before penatration, that may release some of the stress on him, decreasing his stress/anxiety and perhaps even allow him to last a little longer because he’s not worried about “pleasing” her. And as a side note… I enjoy sex whether I orgasm or not. Although I love to cum, I still find pleasure in sex just for the sex itself…

  5. I am a Man. I can have Multiple Orgasms too. Sorry girls, but this shit isn’t just for you!

    I first became curious about Men having multiple orgasms when my first serious GF, several years ago now would give me blow jobs. Back then I was rather inexperienced and found it extremely hard to ejaculate/orgasm when receiving head or a hand job.

    It resulted in what felt like continual “mini-orgasms” and “close calls” that felt amazing but at the time I was frustrated for not reaching what I thought was the only result for a man, an ejaculation orgasm.

    Luckily I came across a book on Amazon which I ordered a few years ago called: “The Multi-Orgasmic Man: Sexual Secrets Every Man Should Know” which you can find here (http://www.amazon.com/Multi-Orgasmic-Man-Sexual-Secrets-Should/dp/0062513362)

    No, I don’t have shares in the book, but it’s so good, I just have to share it because it really changed my life.

    It’s not just for Men either, there’s a chapter in the book for Women to read which informs them all about the Male Orgasm.

    What it basically teaches you, is that the male orgasm and ejaculation are two seperate things that usually happen split secounds apart. You can control this through practising a number of techniques in the book, like strengthening your PC Muscle and Breathing techniques.

    The latter is most important and one I use a lot when having sex with my GF and feel I am “losing control” of my orgasm.

    The book also taught me a new way of masturbating, instead of using porn or fantasizing over something, it was more mindful, focusing on your own body and the sensations.

    However, one thing I have never been able to get on with is that the teachers who wrote the book, try to persuade you from ejaculating because it is not necessary. In fact, they refer to the french saying for the male orgasm “La Petite Mort” AKA The Little Death. Because Once a man ejaculates, all his Engergy in his body is being used to spill the seed in which his body is aiming to reproduce.

    The orgasm, if controlled can be enjoyed again and again and again, like Women enjoy, without the Man ejaculating.

    I use most of the techniques for years and years, and pretty much every time I have sex, I enjoy loads of mini orgasms but I always finish with Ejaculating. The same with masturbation, I just have to ejaculate. Call it habit but it just makes me feel good.

    Plus, my current GF and Ex-GFs have complained when I don’t ejaculate. Perhaps they can’t accept a man can orgasm without it, or it’s the fact Semen has multiple beneficial effects whether swallowed or through penetration (but that’s for another topic).

    Girls, Guys, read this book, it really is amazing!

    • Loki, I just downloaded it to my nook, so I’ll let you know what I think of it. Maybe M can become as multi-orgasmic as me. If that happens, we won’t ever leave the bedroom! But it does make sense that men can have muliple orgasms, and that ejaculation and orgasm are not necessarily the same thing. That’s how it is with women, and our bodies are much more alike than most people realize.
      And although I don’t know why, I don’t think I’d like it if M didn’t ejaculate… Obviously I don’t know what it’s like to be a man and have an orgasm, but I know when I squirt, it is a much stronger orgasm than my “normal” orgasm. I would assume that this is the same for all you guys out there. I don’t know… I’m going to have to think about this one…

      • Of course, ejaculation makes it feel “stronger” but what they say in the book is that, without ejaculating, an orgasm GIVES a guy more energy and bounce. Whereas if he does ejaculate, he will feel more TIRED.

        I read an article recently on studies about the effects of semen on Women. It acted as an anti-depressant whether swallowed or through penetration without a condom. It stated that women who broke up with their partner that didnt use condoms, all rebounded quicker than those who broke up with partners who wore condoms. its believed that there’s a sub concious need for semen.

        of course i am paraphrasing, can’t find the link to the article. sorry. Interesting though!

        • That is interesting. I’m going to look in to it and see what I can find. And it makes sense. I know that semen helps to induce labor by “thinning” (the actual term is effacing) the cervix… Our bodies do some awesome things!

  6. It does indeed, it’s just a shame the taste isn’t as pleasant as Women’s. Although I know through diet, a man can alter the taste to make it less salty, it’s a very long process as the sperm is produced (in the body) 3 months prior to ejaculation.

    Ironically however, I’ve been complemented on my taste through various lovers, despite me having a rather poor diet (coffee and cake are my vices).

  7. I forgot to add, I’ve also read elsewhere that the taste of a Woman’s “juices” can actually act as an aphrodisiac for Men, especially in Long Term Relationships, where the Man gets a required taste for his female partner. I can actually relate to this with my GF, I love how she tastes!

    • I agree… And for me, it’s not so much the taste (although I will agree that women do taste better), it’s the consistency. And maybe the actual ejaculation, as it’s all of a sudden in your mouth… Although if she’s cumming on your face, then it may not be to different. And I’ve started the multi-orgasmic man. Interesting reading so far. Thanks for recommending it. I’m sure I’ll be blogging about it soon!

  8. I believe semen helping induce labour is down to it containing Oxytocin – which is also given as an IV to induce labour. Though I’d be skeptical about any health “benefits” to consuming semen … either orally or vaginally.

    The attractiveness of the taste of female jusices is not that suprising when you consider how male animals use smell to know when females are “in heat”. As a species we have very limited nasal sensory membranes (IIRC a dog’s is something like 300 times better than ours) but other than the 5 basic tastes (salt, sweet, bitter, sour and umami) nearly everything we taste is actually smelt. So the fact that men like the taste of an aroused woman is pretty primal really – our primitive brain smells pussy and tells us the woman wants to fuck.

    This does all raise another topic – that of snowballing.

    • Well… I’m going to have to research this for a future post. I think semen has a lot of protein, but I don’t know–that could just be an urban myth. And talking about females, I read once that a woman’s saliva will actually change compostion when she’s ovulating, maybe having more testorone (?), so that when she kisses her partner, she will increase his arousal. I’m def going to have to blog about this…

  9. Pingback: Multiple Male Orgasms | Laa's Hot Spot

  10. Caitlyn, I have a different perspective on “lasting longer.” I contend that men too easily finish love making as soon as they ejaculate/orgasm. While men typically struggle with all of the techniques listed here, the one area that is not explored is how to break through the post-ejaculation libido crash. We can be pleasuring our partners immediately following our release. The arousal aspects of diving down into the mess that we just made are incredible! Within just a few short minutes of tasting the mixture of our love juices, my equipment is fully functional. My wife is nearing another orgasm (from the oral stimulation) and I am aroused by the tasted of our juices.

    Moments after starting post-ejaculation cunnilingus, she climaxes and wants me back inside and I am more than ready to go. This second time in, I (of course) am lasting longer. My wife, who until recently never had substantial PIV orgasms, is experiencing a series of them with me thrusting inside of her. When I finally do climax, I release again and then, I am back for another round. We change things up – different positions, etc. – but continue. We can do that for quite a while. For me. three orgasms is normal. Some nights, I can achieve four two five and my wife has many more than that. It isn’t just about climaxes, though. The feeling of being intimate at that level is unprecedented in our marriage prior to post-orgasm cunnilingus. It changed everything for both of us. Lasting longer? That isn’t the question. Extending our intimacy is the goal.

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