Category Archives: rants

What more can I say… Oh, wait!

Apparently I’m a Little Sexist

I wrote my first piece of viral content last week. On Friday night, sometime around midnight, I was a little drunk and finished up a Quora post about things men should know (if you’re one of the few who know my real name, come find me!). By the same time the next evening, my answer had received over 150,000 views, it had well over 1,000 upvotes, and my measly 400 followers had grown by over 200. Not huge, by any standards, but viral enough to bring a smile to my lips and a boost to my ego. Continue Reading

Where I Find Myself In a Weird Place


Here, I call myself Caitlyn McConnell, although I assume most of you must realize that’s not who I really am, merely just a small piece of the real me.

I find myself in a weird place here, where I once felt more me than anywhere else. A place that feels vaguely familiar, yet intrinsically different. Continue Reading

I’m His Slut, Not Yours: A Pissed Off Rant

Just bitching. You’ve been warned.

So… I’ve recently become more active on social media. I’ve used my @lsmblogger on Twitter off and on, but I haven’t touched the LSAM Facebook page in years. **Sorry for the shameless plug** Continue Reading

In Need of Stress Relief

I shouldn’t be posting right now. There are 152 things I need to get done. Writing that’s already missed its deadline. A deadline approaching that is impossible to reach at this point. Dishes to due. Laundry to put away. Legs that need shaved. Continue Reading

Those Around You

One of my long-term goals is to become a writer. Well, I write, therefore I guess I am a writer. But I want to be an author. And it’s not about fame or money or publicity (which really doesn’t happen with most writers anyway). And honestly, as much as I’d love to see my name on the cover a book, it’s not even that. Continue Reading

Fuck You, September!

Christ, as much as I wished my summer away, due to busyness and obligations, I never would have done it had I known what September had in store for me.

Not only was there school starting and helping the kiddos get back into the swing of things, but then there was an anticipated job change that fell through, leaving one of us unemployed and finances a little tight. Continue Reading

Shame on Us, Ladies: 2013 Sex Survey

So my idea was to do a post on the iVillage 2013 Married Sex Survey but I seem to have gotten all distracted by this specific result and I wanna bitch about it. Don’t worry, I won’t be offended if you don’t read. Continue Reading

To the Asshole Mother Fucker Who Broke into My House

Dear assumed drug addict,

My name is LSAM and today was the second happiest day of my life, which is exactly what I said to my husband M earlier.  Today we bought our first house.  It’s not a pretty house right now, but it will be.  And it’s ours.  We own it.  No one can take it from us.  The only day that I have been more excited in my life, was the day I got married… Continue Reading

In Response to “Men’s Complaints About Women”

Flogger 02

Flogger 02 (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Okay, it’s been a long time since I’ve gone off on LSAM.  And I mean truly gone off and freaked out and ranted and raved about something I’ve read.  Months, at least.  And honesty, I wasn’t even going to write tonight, I was simply going to do a meme, as I’m tired as shit, it’s been a long Monday, which followed a long, sore weekend **good and bad sore.  After Friday night, M had me where I was sore both on my pussy and my ass, and then too much alcohol and Ritalin, accompanied by a 5 am bedtime, left me with a very sore head and attitude**.  But then this article stumbled across my feet, and my filter was removed, and know I’m spilling it onto you my dear readers.  You’ve been warned.  Rant approaching. Continue Reading

What’s Up, Y’All?

Fucking Aldabra Tortoises in Honolulu Zoo

Fucking Aldabra Tortoises in Honolulu Zoo (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Alright you little pervs…  First and foremost, I need to apologize to you.  I have a handful of faithful readers, and I’ve dropped the ball as a blogger…  I used to post everyday, or at least almost everyday.  And, if you know me, you know that my life has been chaos.  But that doesn’t make for an excuse to slack on my responsibilities.  I really am going to try and do better.  We’ll see. Continue Reading

Sex Stuff, Rants, and A Challenge

My evening played out a little differently then I imagine it would…  I was hoping to get laid (go

Mistress Jada dominating Mistress Veronica in ...

Mistress Jada dominating Mistress Veronica in an S&M Dungeon (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

figure), and I tried to set it up that way, as my first text to M this morning was simply “Morning lover.  and just a heads up… i really need fucked.”  I thought that would do the trick.  But, as often happens, life gets in the way.  I was home late from work, and that made the hubby a bit pissy.  We battled it out a bit, trying to see who could be pissier.  But after dinner, before the kids’ bath, I gave him a blow job — a pretty good one if I do say so myself (hands wrapped in hair, a bit of gagging, face fucking, coming on my tongue, then a deep dick swallow — sorry, apparently I’m still stuck in the TMI mode).  And then I put the kids in the tub, and by the time I got them in bed, he was peacefully sleeping on the couch.  So, I guess only self-loving for LSAM tonight.  Oh, well… Continue Reading

WTF! More Bullshit Relationship Advice

Erotic art by Édouard-Henri Avril.

Image via Wikipedia

First, let me apologize.  I feel like I’m ranting, again.  But I didn’t know what to post tonight, and I just came across this, and it pissed me off, so here you go.

Where do people get this shit!  I found this on (whose tag line is Smart Talk About Love), which I get daily emails from.  Sometimes it has interesting articles, which can help to spark my imagination on upcoming posts.  Today was not one of those days.  I was rummaging through my emails tonight, and I see an article titled “She’s Doing Threesomes & He’s Doing Lonesome.”  And I instantly thought about my threesome series and thought it may be interesting to tag.  And then I started reading it… Continue Reading

Bullshit Information on Women

So, as I was surfing the net today, looking up random stuff on sex (one of the many benefits of having a blog), I came across this bullshit

advice article from Men’s Health titled “10 Signs She’s Not Satisfied.”  I’m normally a big fan of Men’s Health, but this thing just pissed me off.  While a few (2) may have some validity, the rest are fucking stupid.  Take a look at the dumb ass advice they are giving you guys.  What The Fuck!?! Continue Reading