Thank you, thank you. No need to applause.

Madelinelaughs from Spread Information recently nominated me for the Versatile Blogger Award. Yay!! So you know the spiel, here we go!

THE RULES

1. Display the award logo on your blog.
2. Thank and Link back to the person who nominated you.
3. State 7 things about yourself.
4. Nominate 15 bloggers for this award.
5. Notify those bloggers of the nomination by linking to one of their specific posts so that they get notified by ping back.

Thank you dear Madeline!

7 things about me… that you don’t already know… this might be a hard one!

1. Sometimes it’s like I live two lives… The “outside” me: helper working with addicts, a girl scout leader, a catholic school mom. The “real” me: erotica writing, bisexual  sex blogger who’s a submissive to her Husband, loves kinky sex and, at any given time, could not pass a urine test.

2. I denied, even to myself, that I liked girls for a very long time. I started sleeping with my bff shortly after the beginning of our freshman year of high school. We were fucking rather regularly for maybe close to a year, and then for the next 5 or so years, randomly. During what I would call our relationship, I would never admit to being bi. “I don’t like girls,” I would say, “I just like you…” I remember her laughing at me, knowing full well I was in denial. Fuck, even way back when LSAM was in its novice stages, I was still in denial. No longer.

3. I’m sure I’ve said it before, but I am REALLY horrible with communication in terms of M’s and my (your welcome HH) dynamic. I truly suck. He’ll even ask me things, and I’ll get all shy and awkward. I tend to use the blog as a platform when I can communicate with him, hence beatings and girlfriends. But even then, I don’t sit down and talk to him, discuss details. He’ll ask, I’ll clam up. This is something I’m working on… **haha. Did you get my joke… your, you’re? haha* *I’m a dork. Apologies.

4. I impulsively buy books. I can’t stop myself. If I see one of my favorite books at a garage sale or somewhere, and it’s less than $2, I can’t stop myself from buying it. Just because it’s so good, and it’s sitting there, unloved. I will pass them on, to friends, family, clients. But I have probably close to 1,000 books right now, and that’s not counting my nook. And I am constantly purging them. Probably about 5 years ago or so, when my mother moved in with us, I literally got rid of half of them. For every one I wanted to keep, I made myself give one away. But still… way too many books.

5. I was recently put on blood pressure medication. It makes me feel old.

6. I’m so happy to be somewhat active in our little blogging community again. Although I’m not around as much as I’d like to be, it’s a huge improvement to where I was just a few months ago. Fuck, in February, I only made one post, and it was a fucking blog award. *not that I don’t like blog awards!!* Wtf… It’s definitely an improvement and it makes me happy!upsidedown2

7. M has a fantastic cock. Just in case you were wondering… And here’s a pic just to prove it to you. **hehe. I think I’m getting off on posting pictures lately** This was taken the same day as last week’s Boobday.

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So there’s my 7 random facts. Thank you very much if you’ve read this far! I don’t like to pass awards on all too often, unless I have a whole lot to hand out, because I know so many deserving bloggers out there, I can’t just pick a few. If you want to know who I follow and my particularly favorite posts by them, check out the widgets to the right. It’s all there…

I was gonna post 7 things worthy of reading, but I’m starting to get rather buzzed  up and need to jump in the shower to prepare for some rather kinky lovin’. Maybe next time…

And the song of the day, because of #6. I’m back.

And then… Someone randomly emailed me and asked if they could write a guest post, promoting a new app. Why the fuck not I thought… So here you go with the guest blogger… It kinda fits, as M and I were fuck buddies before we were anything else. It’s funny how things work out…

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Friend of a Friend from Darren Douglas….

We all know the feeling don’t we; being the only singleton in your friendship group is like carrying a giant sandwich board round your neck saying ‘Help Me!’ It doesn’t matter if you need relationship advice from your friends or not. The fact is, you’re going to get it from most of them and there’s nothing you can do to stop it.

This unwanted help comes in many different forms. Some of your less-happily married friends will stare wistfully out the window while washing the dishes, telling you to enjoy the single life while you can. Your happily unattached friends will tell you how to pick up the opposite sex and offer to be your wing-buddy in this ‘awesome little bar they know’ which turns out to be a dive.

The worst kinds of friends, though, are the newly-in-love couples. Whether you’re jealous of their honeymoon romance or not, it’s hard not to get frustrated when they flaunt it all over the place. They are convinced that you need to have what they have in order to be happy – and then comes the set-up.

“Oh. My. God. Tyler has a friend who would be perfect for you. He’s really nice, great personality, fantastic prospects…” In total honesty, my mind usually wanders at this point in the description. I make a rash judgement that the guy is going to be too short, too weird or just too non-sexy to already be taken. Of course I try not to make this sort of generalisation but after a life consisting of bad dates and even worse romantic comedies, it’s hard not to.

But maybe it’s wrong to write off a blind date completely? If there’s one thing I have learned from all those bad dates and bad movies is that these hook-ups can sometimes lead to good sex even if the emotional side is pretty unfulfilling. Some people would consider that devoting a whole evening to getting to know somebody who might be a complete psycho is a waste of time and money, but if you have any interest in human behaviour and sexual motivation then it’s a fascinating way to spend your free time.

Of course, not all friends want to set you up with acquaintances who you have never met before. On a few rare occasions, you might be selected for the friendship cross-breed, and then you’ll be on very dangerous ground indeed. Every so often – like once in a blue moon – you and a friend will find yourselves so single that you end up in bed together. Hey, we’ve all done it. Sometimes it can even be a little bit heart-warming and beautiful, but does it work in the long term?

I’m guessing that somebody somewhere has made a long-lasting marriage from a long-standing friendship and not had to endure a bitter break-up where they never speak to each other again. In fact, men are programmed to believe the latter from an early age as nearly every teenage boy has been rejected with the line “it would ruin our friendship” at some point or another. The truth is, it’s girl-speak for “I don’t think you’re hot” but they will never truly accept that.

What have we learnt from this analysis? Friends have their place in relationships. That place is on the end of the phone, Facebook chat or the opposite stool in a bar, laughing as you tear your past, present and future lovers a proverbial new one. Blind dating can be a lot of fun, as can sleeping with a close pal, as long as the ghosts don’t follow you around forever.