On Friday, I celebrated yet another birthday, my 34th. And as I hate to see November go by without a post here on LSAM, you’re going to be subjected to 34 pieces of utter randomness.

Sorry for your luck.

  1. I’m a crazy bitch. I sat here, ranting and raving about building a community and how I felt it was lacking, and blah, blah, blah. And then I disappear for almost 6 weeks. Say it with me folks. Crazy Bitch.
  2. I think 34 sounds sexier than 33. I think I have a thing for even numbers.
  3. Pay attention tomorrow. My good buddy Accidental is hosting a Guess the Blogger, which is always uber fun. I may not have posted in forever, but I am participating. See if you can figure out who I am… *wink*wink*
  4. I just got my official writing portfolio site up, and shit, fuck, damn. WordPress.org is not quite the same as WordPress.com. I thought it would be a breeze, but fuck, it took me a solid 10 hours just to figure out how to use the theme I picked.
  5. Tomorrow it will be four months since I’ve quit my day job. Although I’m broke as a joke, I’m happier than I have ever been.
  6. Cortisol is a bitch. My stress levels were crazy high at my day job. Since quitting, I have not changed my diet or exercise routine (lack there of), but I’ve dropped a solid 15 pounds and two pants sizes. That’s what stress does to you.
  7. I’ve learned that living on less is way more satisfying that always trying to get more.
  8. This is your life. The only one you’ve got. You need to start living it.
  9. Stuff does not make you happy. People, experiences and memories have a much greater impact.
  10. 34 spanks, which is what I received on Friday night, did not quite seem like enough.
  11. The Candy Crush gods hate me.
  12. I’ve started to try my hand at raising rabbits for meat. If you ever buy rabbits, especially from a young Amish boy named Vernon, always sex them yourself.
  13. Pretty soon, I expect I’m going to have some little inbreed bunnies. Apparently Vernon does not know what a rabbit dick looks like.
  14. Apple cider vinegar is a natural cure all.
  15. When you have a friend that’s a soul mate, it doesn’t matter how long you’ve gone without talking, it’s like they were never gone.
  16. On that same note, it doesn’t matter how well you know someone, they can still surprise the shit out of you.
  17. I signed a book deal for a beginner’s book on blogging. Unfortunately, this is my only blog and I can’t really reference it.
  18. I have a gig that doesn’t allow me to use contractions. How fucking weird is that? It’s one of the most difficult things to do while writing.
  19. You want to know the secrets to great SEO…? Regular, consistent, quality content.
  20. When you are four, you never need to sleep. That’s what my four year old says.
  21. Sometimes, past hobbies sneak out of the recesses to be enjoyed again.
  22. I’m afraid that this is my sexual peak, and that my libido and sexual responsiveness are going to plummet in the future.
  23. I have a love/hate relationship with my Hitachi.
  24. And my boobs.
  25. Once you fuck things up, sometimes it seems impossible to fix them.
  26. Success is personal.
  27. Flossing is very important. I’ve learned this the hard way.
  28. I believe in evolution, natural selection and science. God if I’m grieving, scared or pregnant.
  29. I still believe in Santa.
  30. I don’t believe in the Oxford comma.
  31. Or racism.
  32. Self-hosting is not all it’s cracked up to be. Not saying I’m not going there, but sometimes it’s nice to only have to worry about getting the words on the page.
  33. Apparently 34 is old. I almost threw my back out today from coughing.
  34. Even with stretch marks, a few grey hairs and crow’s feet spring up around my eyes, I’ve never felt sexier and healthier than I do now at 34. Here’s to hoping it only gets better.