Masturbation Monday : Oh. My. Fucking. God.

I’m sure by now y’all know Kayla Lords and her Masturbation Monday meme. Whenever I’ve participate in it in the past, I’ve always written little bits of erotica.

But oh my fucking god, this week I’m rendered speechless. Here’s the inspirational gif she used for this week’s theme.

Masturbation Monday Week 30

Oh. My. Fucking. God. I’m sorry to say it again, but I can’t help it. This is amazing.

First, this is one gorgeous cock. Mouth watering, nipple tightening, pussy clenching gorgeous.

I’m seriously so distracted by his movement, it’s hard to type.

I love his hard grip, the way his fingers squeeze the tip of his cock tighter on the end of his upstroke. I love the looseness of his hand at the bottom of the down stroke.

I love the little squeeze he gives the whole base.

Oh my god. I’m drooling.

I want nothing more than to bend down on this cock and take it in my mouth. Swallow it deep in the back of my throat and gag on it.

I want to swirl my tongue around its swollen head, teasing it with my mouth.

I want hands in my hair, forcing me to take it harder and faster than is comfortable.

I want to sit down on it, slowly taking it into me, my wetness coating the velvety skin, as I slip down to the base.

I’d wait there just a moment, allow myself time to adjust to the girth and length of him. Then I’d start my ride.

Sliding up and down on his cock, it wouldn’t take long before we’d be slick with my juices. My direction changes, moving to grind against him, my back arched so my clit presses against his flesh.

As my pace increases, my hips thrusting back and forth, his strong hands reach up to pinch my nipples, twisting them hard between his fingers. With a low growl, he thrusts up and causes me to explode, spasming on his cock, getting lost in the pleasure and pain he’s creating.

Before my crests subside, he rolls us over, pulls his cock out of my pussy, moves it to my mouth and strokes just like he is here, only harder and faster. My mouth opens and a moment before he begins to cum, he pushes between my lips and hot jets of his cum swarm into my mouth and down my throat as he thrusts, two, three, four times before pulling back and out of my mouth, his cock bobbing in appreciation.

Mmmm… Yes. Masturbation Monday indeed.

MM Badge

Go see what everyone else is rubbing one down to this week.

Trust: The One Thing a Woman Needs to Be Submissive

It’s not kink.

It’s not a man with an Alpha gene.

It’s trust. Pure and simple.

A dear friend of mine is struggling in her marriage. Recently separated, but still together, it’s almost painful to watch what they’re doing to each other.

Just the other day, we were talking and discussing how she needs him to “Dom up.” Now she didn’t necessarily mean that he should grab her by the hair, force her to her knees, and make her gag on his cock (although I don’t think she’d mind that). No. She meant it in a more meaningful way.

She needs him to man up and take care of her and their life. She doesn’t want to completely let go, but she wants to know she’s taken care of. She wants to know that when she can’t be strong, he can.

She understands that sometimes, she needs someone to put her in her place, instead of just going along with what she says to “keep the peace.” She needs a man that can take her by the hand and point out her errors in thinking. Someone who encourages her to make positive changes, and helps her deal with overcoming the negative.

And when she can’t do that, when she struggles, she needs a man who can make it happen, one way or another. A man who will do what needs to be done.

And I was thinking about this later that night. The problem with the man in her life is that even if he stepped up and started doing this things, it wouldn’t matter. She feels he has let her down so many times in the past, in too many ways, that there is no more trust in their relationship. Oh, she trusts that he’s not fucking around. She trusts that he loves her. But she doesn’t trust that he’ll be there for her or that he’ll follow through with what he says. And because these things have happened so often in the past, she struggles to let them go and move forward.

So even if he “Dom’s up,” it won’t fix the situation that they’re in. Because she doesn’t trust him. She doesn’t trust that he won’t drop the ball. She doesn’t trust him to keep his promises. And he doesn’t know what to do to make it better. And they’re stuck in this horrible cycle that just seems to continue and continue.

And right now, this friend is extremely vulnerable. Separated from the man she’s been with for the last 17 years, she wants nothing more than to move forward with him by her side, but how can she when there’s no trust? How can she when she fears letting down her guard, because every time she does, he lets her down?

Trust, people. It’s so important. On so many different levels.

The same day we had this conversation, I was reading this post over at Desiring Discipline (one of M’s favorite blogs btw) and it got me thinking about this more and more and what an important aspect trust is to submission.

There is no way a woman can ever truly be submissive unless she trusts the person towering over her. She must trust Him with her safety. With her body. With her mind. Because these things are literally in the palm of His hand. He can damage her body. He can crush her psyche. He can take her soul.

A woman must trust Him to make decisions that are in her best interest, even when she doesn’t like it. She must know that when He says something, she needs to obey, because He is always thinking about her and the relationship that binds them together. He may require things of her that she doesn’t want to do, but will do because of her submission. She must trust, always, that His actions serve a greater purpose. His purpose.

To be submissive, you must make yourself vulnerable. You’ve got to let go of the need to control. You’ve got to stop worrying about your own needs, and trust that your Sir will take care of them.

Because He will. Because that’s what a Dom does.

It takes a strong man to be a Sir.


Sorry for the random ramble. I’m just thinking out loud. Working out things in my head.

What do you think about trust? How do you move past this type of letdown? How do you let go of the pain and anger and be able to heal? Be able to trust in that one person again?

Birthday Celebrations, First Dates, and Great Sex

I figured this year would be the only year I would get to make her day extra special. I therefore wanted to make 34 one she’d never forget. And with her birthday Saturday and M’s on Wednesday, it seemed like the perfect weekend to celebrate.

Lynn arrived shortly after 4, and by 4:30 the three of us left for dinner. Although we’ve been out to dinner probably hundreds of times together over the years, this was the first time the three of us had gone out as the three of us.

I was a wreck, a ball of nerves, jittery and quiet, compared to my normal, talkative self.

But after we got halfway through our first drink, things started to relax. After dinner, M dropped us off at a local fundraising event, which was hosting a wine tasting. By the end of the two hour event, we had found ourselves a little corner of the area, hidden from the waist down by bookshelves. We were touching as much as we could without getting caught.

As soon as the Chinese auction was over (where we won tickets to the opera and a hotel room), we headed out to meet M, who was waiting to pick us up. Back to our place we went for presents and birthday cake.

Within a few hours, we were in bed, stretched out, the three of us naked and hands everywhere.

Like the times before, the three of us flowed together, moving from moment to moment without question or hesitation. So much touching, kissing, licking, and sucking, that we were at a point, to use Lynn’s words, where you don’t know, nor care, whose hands or mouth or lips are whose, because it all feels so good and it really doesn’t matter.

Sixty-nining, Lynn was beneath me when M moved between her knees, his cock in hand. His fingers started playing with her pussy, while I pulled my lips back to her clit, licking and sucking and nibbing. When he pushed into her, I stopped to watch, their bodies joined, while Lynn continued to play with my pussy, fingers moving in and out, keeping pace with her and M.

M, watching her and I while he pounded her cunt, pulled out, allowing me to drop my mouth to her lips and clit, sucking them into my mouth for a moment before giving him access again. Over and over again we did this, his cock, my mouth; my mouth, his cock. The sounds she made at each switch still echo in my head.

Not too long later, me on my back, M now between my legs, Lynn laid opposite of me, and while my fingers reached between her legs, her lips sealed onto my clit, her tongue flicking across it, making me clench against him. It felt so amazingly good, his cock and her mouth, that I could do nothing but move against them, accepting the pleasure they gave.

At the end of the night, for our last go round, M fucked me doggy style, while I lay between Lynn’s legs, lazily playing with her pussy. We’d been going at it for hours, and this was the first time we’d really slowed down, and it gave me the opportunity to explore her with my fingers and mouth. With M slowly moving in and out of me, his eyes again on the girls in front of him, I licked and touched and watched her and her responses. As his pace increased, so did mine, my fingers turning into her g-spot, while my mouth played havoc on her clit. When he came, M’s hand was wrapped in my hair, pushing my face harder in to Lynn’s pussy, not allowing me to move as I buried myself in her.

When sleep finally came, the three of us lay together in our bed, exhaustion from the night and orgasms obvious on our bodies.

It wasn’t my birthday, but I’m going to wager it was a good one. I know it’s not one I’ll soon forget!

I’m so Excited: The Vibra King Arrived

Okay. See this box, the one right below here.

wpid-0320151331a.jpgWell you’ll never guess what’s inside it.

A vintage Vibra King massager. Not sure what a Vibra King is? Check out this Red Tube video  or watch it below to be enlightened. Go ahead, do it now. I’ll wait.

Did you watch it?

Now you understand why I’m so excited, right?!

They say it puts the Hitachi to shame.

M’s been searching and searching for one of these since before my birthday in November. But the little beasts are hard to come by. They’re not regularly on eBay, and when they are, they go upwards of $150.00, often with a bidding war during the final moment.

But finally he found one he liked, in mint condition, and now it’s here! It wasn’t scheduled to arrive until Tuesday, so you can imagine my surprise when I found this beautiful little box in the mail today.

And I’ve been sitting here staring at it since 11 o’clock this morning.

I know I can’t open it until he gets home, but I want to so bad.

I’ve had my fair share of vibrators, from rabbits to wands, from cheap to top of the line, but nothing ever like this. It may not be the prettiest thing out there, but if what they say is true, it’ll make you scream.

Please hurry home Daddy! My panties are wet!

In Need of Stress Relief

I shouldn’t be posting right now. There are 152 things I need to get done. Writing that’s already missed its deadline. A deadline approaching that is impossible to reach at this point. Dishes to due. Laundry to put away. Legs that need shaved.

But I’m overwhelmed. It’s been one of those days. And I haven’t had one of these days in such a long, long time, apparently I’ve forgotten how to handle them. From loose horses and broken fences to trips to the ER and an aching tooth, all I can think to do is scream.

Truly, I don’t want to do anything. I want to take a scalding hot shower. Put on my most comfortable PJs, curl up in bed, and fall asleep until tomorrow, when things can start anew.

But alas, a 4 year old who had his head split open not once, but twice, and a sick 7 year old prevent that from even being a possibility.

So I sit down to work. And my hands stay still at the keyboard. I can feel my pulse beating in my chest. And the tears threatening to spill from my eyes.

And the stupid 2 week old chicks are making all this racket from the room next to me and there’s a timer ticking somewhere that is too ridiculously loud. And I just want to scream. Or cry. Or cum.

And I start to think about M. And how I was so needy last night, seeking reassurance from him after Saturday night. And how even though he was exhausted from work, he still took me to bed.

I think of how good it felt with his head between my legs. What his mouth and fingers and lips do to my body. I think about cumming, over and over again, yet he wouldn’t stop, he kept going, taking me higher and higher.

My shoulders drop and I feel a small amount of tension leave my neck.

I remember what it felt like when he pushed into me, my hips supported by pillows, my ankles over his shoulders. I can almost feel how his cock instantly pressed into g-spot and how the warmth of his mouth felt surrounding my nipple. I remember what it felt like cumming together, his cock buried so deep in my pussy that it made me ache.

While this makes me feel a little better, it’s still not quite enough.

But wait.

I think I just heard M’s van pull in the drive. Now it’s time for some real stress relief.

Wish me luck people.



My Lucky Life

I received the first text early yesterday afternoon: “So I just wanted to say if things go down badly, you guys should come get drunk with me here.”

Just those simple words spiked my libido, especially after last weekend’s Brazilian waxing episode. But I doubted anything would come to fruition, after all, the hockey game wouldn’t be over until after 10, and I figured chances are by the time we got back to town, you’d be asleep.

So when the text came through at nine, saying you were headed out to the bar, the stupid hockey game couldn’t end quickly enough.

Nearly two hours later, we made it back. Drinks were had, shots were poured, and within only a few minutes, there was little doubt left that we would end up in bed together yet again. It was then that my panties started to get wet.

As we stood at the bar, legs touching where no one could see, I wanted nothing more than to taste your lips.

More drinks and hands became freer, less concerned about the others standing around and more concerned about the feeling of your skin on mine.

I wish I could have seen the boy’s face when you told him to quit trying because you were coming home to fuck us.

And then there was the random boy who could get Molly, and that topped the night off.

As soon as the rolling began, I wanted nothing more than to feel you both, flesh on flesh, heat on heat, pleasure spawning more pleasure.

You were wetter than I’ve ever seen you, your pussy so eager for attention. I couldn’t get enough.

And you’ve been so frustrated this week with life issues. It was nice to see you let go and enjoy the simple pleasures of fingers, tongues, pussies, and cock.

It made me laugh, because the first time, I remember you commenting to M about how receptive I am. Well, girl, if only you could have seen how beautiful you looked, laying back on the bed with your eyes closed and your back arched, as waves of pleasure washed across your body. Watching you cum again and again, it was absolutely fucking gorgeous.

And you were such as a dirty girl, loving the flogger, the nipple clamps, the Hitachi, touching places you’ve never touched before.

Although I’ve never said it, I’m sure you know there have been many, many times over these last few months when you were in our bed, even when you weren’t. On both our minds as we touched and played, I’d think of things to come in the future.

And one of things I always thought about is you riding Him while I straddle his face. And when that happened last night, it was beyond my expectations. Watching you lower yourself onto His hard cock, the look on your face as you were filled with His length, watching you rock and grind against Him, it was exquisite.

And, oh how I loved laying beneath you as He fucked you from behind, your swollen clit between my lips, my eyes only inches from where the two of you joined, His cock sliding into your tight little pussy.

The moment, shortly after 4 am, I don’t know how we got there, with you on your back and M between your legs, your knees bent far and wide to give him full access. I knew He didn’t want to cum yet, but how could I not encourage it, with you begging Him for more, begging Him to fuck you harder and harder.

And when the two of you came together, my love for you both grew beyond what I thought was possible.

After the final kiss between the three of us, when we curled up and wrapped around each other in bed, it felt like the most normal thing in the whole world, three bodies joined in exhaustion from the pursuit of each other’s pleasure.

Last night was perfect, in so many ways. Unlike the first time, which was so fuzzy with alcohol and Ritalin. Unlike the second time, which was apprehensive and sort of scary, because we were doing it with intention.

Last night was different. It was effortless. It was natural. It feels so fucking right, the three of us together this way.

And here I am, again today, delaying showering, because I don’t want to wash the scent of you from my body.

Next weekend, my dear, be prepared. My plan is to give you a birthday you will never forget.

Not us, but could have been... "Threesome (one man and two women)" by golden retriever fan - Flickr: file.bin-2. Licensed under CC BY 2.0 via Wikimedia Commons -

Not us, but still one of my favorite moments from last night…
via Wikimedia

Erotica: Forbidden – Part II

I’d say I’m sorry for all the girl-girl sex here on the blog lately, but really, I’m not. It seems it’s what’s always on my mind these days.

This is one of my latest WIP, so please excuse the rough edges.

I’m thinking this story is turning into the prelude of Watching, and perhaps the story may become something more.

You can find the first half of this story here.


When her lips left mine, Eve took my hand and led me to the bed. Before I had time to second guess what we were doing, her lips found my cheek and then my ear.

My hands were on her, moving fabric over flesh as I caressed her curves and touched her wherever I could.

I moved to take her mouth with mine and my fingers dug into her hips, pulling her against me.

Eve stepped back, and with her hands on my shoulders, pushed me to the bed as she sank to her knees in from of me, hands following eyes down my body, over my ribs, waist, hips and thighs until they turned at my knees and trailed up my inner thighs.

When her warm breath fell onto my skin, then flowed over my lips and clit, my eyes closed and my head fell back to the bed.

When her lips closed on to my clit, my breath caught in my throat and she placed a chaste kiss on the most intimate part of me. I reached towards her, my fingers fanning into her hair as her lips subsided, replaced by her tongue, flicking and licking across me.

My body started its peak and my hands tightened in her hair as she pulled my bud into her mouth and began sucking, slowly and rhythmically.

Within moments, I’m panting, my hips  thrusting into her mouth, increasing in speed with her sucking until I’m holding her against me, pulling her tighter against my pussy. As my orgasm peaked, I arched off the bed and Eve slipped two fingers between my now spasming lips and rubbed them hard against my g-spot.

For a brief moment, it’s too much, too intense and my hand leaves her head to interrupt her but she gripped it with her free hand and held it in place, never stopping her sucking or her fingers.

I need her to stop, it’s too much. My breathing’s out of control and my mind is spinning, pleasure so intense it hurts. I try to sit up and pull back, but Eve, still gripping onto my wrist, dropped our conjoined hands to my stomach, pinning me in place.

Out of control, my body withered and tears started forming in my eyes. Suddenly, her fingers became more forceful, her sucking harder. The moment her teeth scrapped across the exposed tip of my clit, my body let go and I exploded into her mouth and onto her hands.

The waves flow through my body and crest, then crest again, and I  feel the fluid splashing against her hands and face. But she doesn’t stop, doesn’t release me from the pleasurable torture of her lips.

I find myself lying listless on her bed, my breathing finally slowing and I can feel Eve’s mouth on my thighs, gentle kisses and warm breathes as her fingers move slowly in and out of my pussy and I realized she’s whispering “Shh…” against my skin.

It wasn’t until then that I realized I was crying, silent tears streaming down my cheeks, but my body was too tired, too satiated to wipe them away.

As Eve’s fingers continue to move, she kissed her way from my thighs up and over my mound, her teeth grazing across my hip bones, my nipples. When her lips touched the sensitive spot between my breasts, my hand moved to pull her mouth to mine.

As our lips touched, Eve finished her climb up my body, her fingers still moving, now with more force as her lips and tongue meshed with my own.

My hands ran down her back and I grabbed the hem of her shirt, pulling it up and over her head. My shirt, pooled at my neck, was next. Eve fell onto me, our flesh hot against one another, her fingers deep in my pussy, curved so that my body was moving with her, wanting more.

She dropped to her elbow, her hand wrapped in my hair, and started fucking me, her whole body between my legs, her hips forcing her fingers deeper, her palm pressed hard against my clit.

Her mouth was all over, on my lips, my neck, my shoulders. She overwhelmed me, and I was lost in her, in the things she was doing to me, the pleasure that was rolling over me.

Her lips were on my ear, voice soft and sweet. “You are so fucking beautiful,” she whispered.

Those words pushed me off the ledge I’d been balancing on and waves of upon waves of glorious pleasure washed over my mind and body. She didn’t relent and pushed me further, and further still, until I was nothing but a quaking mess beneath her.

Eventually, her pace slowed, and I floated caught in the moment of exquisiteness, my body a bundle of electric nerves, twitching as she placed kisses along my cheeks, moving towards my mouth.

When her lips met mine, joy and love washed through me, and my tongue moved to met hers in an intimate embrace.

Eve moved off my body, curling hers around me, and we lay there, naked in one another’s arms, basking in what was created between us. Our hands moved lazily across skin, touching and exploring, in no rush for our love making to end.

But as Eve moved to pull me closer, we both froze at the sound of the door opening.

“Eve, I wanted to let you know…” Sir’s voice trailed off when he saw on the bed. He was still a moment, and I watched as the look of shock on his face hardened into anger.

“Caitlyn, to your room,” he demanded, and I could hear the struggle to keep his voice restrained. “Eve, get the belt.”

To be continued…

Afternoon Delight

It’s been a fabulous few weeks in the McConnell household. Since it’s bitter cold outside, M’s not been working, and with me working as a full-time writer, hell, I barely leave the house.

And with our libidos going through the roof, there’s been so much fucking and edging, most of the time I’m walking around like a ticking time bomb, just waiting for the smallest touch so I can explode.

Today was no different, and since it started out with a few flirty texts with Lynn, I was horny by the time the school bus came. But with errands to run and a house to clean, M wasn’t going to let me have any release.

Yet, once we got home and put groceries away, and after a brief visit from my favorite girl, things changed after M got the mail. There were two packages in the post, one of which I wasn’t expecting for a few more days.

I opened up the bag and there was the little white and black French maid costume I ordered. With a matching garter, wrist cuffs, and headband, it was super cute and I wanted to put it on.

M, who’d been edging us both since 8 am, said he wanted to see me in it. So, I stripped off my clothes and donned the newest addition to my lingerie drawer.

I pranced around the kitchen, intentionally bending over the table, putting my ass and undies on display. He leaned back on the counter, unbuckled his belt, unzipped his jeans, and pulled out his now rock hard cock. As I danced across the kitchen, I watched as he stroked it, his eyes never straying from my body.

It wasn’t long before I arched over the kitchen sink, and felt him come up behind me, his lips on my neck as his hands moved down my sides to settle at my hips. As his lips moved from my collarbone to my ear, he pulled me back against him, ensuring I could feel the hard length of him on my ass.

His hands roamed my body, from where my too large breasts were spilling out over the top to where the short skirt fell right below the cheeks of my ass. His fingers started working their way under the skirt and into my panties, and I turned in his arms, my hand reaching for him.

When his fingers reached my lips, I was already wet, and I started stroking him, long and slow. I watched as a drop of pre-cum settled onto his tip. Bending at the waist, keeping my ass in the air, I took him in my mouth and licked him clean.

On my pussy, his fingers started working faster and harder, and soon I couldn’t keep him in my mouth, my body convulsing too much to stay still.

I stood and turned, and standing in front of him dropped to my knees to take him in my mouth. Both his hands moved to my hair, and fingered their way to my scalp, rubbing and moving me where he wanted. While I licked him and took him as far back in my throat as I could, his hands hardened and moved from massaging into a tight grip, forcing my head and mouth back and forth on his cock.

We fell into a rhythm, and soon drool was leaking from my lips and spilling across my chest as I worked not to gag too much on his length. As his pace increased, my body started responding, but before I could cum from sucking his cock, he pulled me off, and looking down at me, his hand in my hair and my mouth open and wet from his cock, he told me I was such a good girl.

With a slight tug on my hair, M pulled me so I standing and as I reached up to kiss his mouth, he grabbed me by the waist and put me on the edge of the counter. Without hesitation, he reached underneath me and pulled my panties down to my knees, before stepping up and slipping his cock into my now soaking cunt.

Before long, I was suspended off the counter, M’s hands on my hips, thrusting me back and forth against him, my ankles on his shoulders, my elbows holding me up on the counter. Biting my lip, I tried to keep quiet as an orgasm rolled through me, making me push against him, wanting him to fuck me harder. When I came, I could hear the sound of the liquid falling onto the kitchen floor.

Helping me down, we moved to the living room, where I knelt down leaning my body on the back of the couch, and pushing my ass out, in what I hoped look like an invitation to come fuck me.

Apparently it worked. Sliding up on the couch behind me, M guided his cock to my pussy, and as he slowly pushed himself inside me, he fisted his right hand around my ponytail and twisted, pulling my head back and my back arch.

As our pace increased, his other hand slipped to my face and I pulled his middle finger into my mouth, sucking it between my lips as he started fucking me harder and harder.

My body started to spasm and cum dripped from between our bodies, but he didn’t let up or slow his pace. Instead he fucked me right through that orgasm, and another. By the time the next one came, I was panting and thrusting against him, him with one hand in my hair and the other hooked in my mouth.

The moment I told him I was going to cum again, he thrust once, twice, three times hard and long, and as my body started to convulse, he pulled out of my pussy, his hand dropping to his cock and stroked it while I squirted all around. My orgasm triggered his and within two more strokes, hot cum was jetting out of his cock, across my back, my ass, my legs, and my pretty little French maid costume.

As we cleaned up our mess and I got redressed for the day, I began to think how much fun cleaning the house is now going to be.

Becoming More Comfortable 69ing

For years, I hated 69ing. Too young and too insecure about my body, I was uncomfortable being exposed and having my most private parts on display.

And then I met M.

The visual creature that he is, 69ing was (and still is) one of his favorite ways to pass the time. Oh, I’d comply, straddle myself across over his mouth, but I was always uncomfortable, still too shy to be able to relax with my pussy and ass only inches from his face.

And then came babies. Three of them. And 80 pounds of extra weight that lingered on my body for years too long. With all of that, 69ing again became a taboo act, with me too unhappy with myself to be able to let go and simply enjoy.

But slowly the weight drifted off and my body confidence started to return, along with the acceptance of the signs of aging and life that showed on my body.

And for the first time in my life, I enjoyed the mutual pleasure 69ing gave. I could finally relax and turn myself over to the give and take it created. But still, if I thought too much about it, my ass cheeks spread only inches from his face, my mind would again get in the way.

But not now. Never again. Now I fully understand M’s reassurance that the sight of my pussy and ass above him is arousing. That he enjoys the vision and it’s what makes it one of his favorite things.

Recently, I’ve been blessed with the opportunity to 69 with another woman. And with me on my back, her pussy on my lips, I can verify ladies, the image is truly intoxicatingly beautiful. Not only does the position give you wonderful access to all the lady parts, but the vision of pussy and ass right there, within tongue’s reach, it’s enough that I really could spend all night right there.

As these thoughts passed through my mind the other day, I decided I should compile a list of ways for women to feel more comfortable when 69ing. After all, if you’re not comfortable, you’re not going to enjoy yourself. And if you’re not enjoying yourself, what the fuck’s the point?

So without further ado, here’s 10 ways to help you relax and enjoy the fine art of 69ing.

  1. Be Clean. One of the main concerns women often have with 69ing, and oral sex in general, is that they feel their vaginas are unclean. Add in a little bit of spread open ass cheeks, and many women are running to the nearest bathroom with wet wipes. Ladies, relax. If you’d like to 69 and you’re concerned that your nether regions aren’t as clean as the rest of you (chances are they’re cleaner, but that’s a different post), simply take a shower before heading to bed. Wash yourself, twice if you must, then put the thought behind you. Your ass and pussy are clean and ready to be devoured.
  2. Shave Your Lips. Whether you’ve got a baldy, a landing strip, or a jungle bush, shaving your lips can do wonders for your partner’s view during a 69. Not only does it smooth things out for him – or her – to take your lips into his mouth or between his teeth, but it opens your whole vulva and creates a heavenly vision. If you really get into it and like to ride against his face, shaving can help prevent both pube floss and bush rug burn.
  3. Be On Top. Although there’s mixed thoughts on this, I believe if you’re uncomfortable while 69ing, it’s best to be on top. When the female’s on the bottom, she has little control as to the depth and speed of the cock in her mouth. Plus when boys start sweating, it can drip down their butt cheeks, over their balls, and onto your face. I know it’s not a pretty sight, but after you 69 enough times in the heat of July, you learn some of these things. By staying on top, you get to decide where and how deep his cock goes, while he gets to see you spread wide and glorious.  
  4. Stay On Your Knees. Although it’s tempting, and perfectly okay, to grind down on his face when he’s licking your pussy during 69ing, if you’re hesitant about the position and slightly uncomfortable doing it, staying on your knees can help. You can keep yourself above him if you’re afraid of suffocating him (you won’t though, even if your grind away, I promise) or too uneasy to let him really get up in there. My guess is once it starts and you get in to it, he’ll be wrapping his arms around your hips and pulling you down closer to him. But for now, if you’d feel better, it’s fine to just try and stay on your knees.
  5. Do It by Candlelight. As I’ve mentioned, one of the reasons women don’t like 69ing is because they feel exposed. Lower that feeling by turning off the lights and lighting some candles instead. Candlelight makes skin look smooth and soft, and while it allows you to see, it masks flaws and imperfections. With candles burning instead of bright florescent lights, you know he won’t be able to see the few hairs you missed or the little bump on your behind (not that he’d care anyway) and can therefore stop worrying about it and enjoy what his tongue’s doing to your clit instead.
  6. Have a Glass of Wine. Or 3. While alcohol and sex sometimes do not mix (although they always mix well in the McConnell household), having a glass or two of wine can help you relax and feel more at ease before heading into the bedroom. The wine settles your nerves and lowers your inhibitions, perhaps allowing you to forget about why you don’t like 69ing and instead find a whole new bunch of reasons why you love it.
  7. Remember It’s Give and Take. The best part of 69ing, for me anyways, is the give and take of mutual pleasure. It’s okay if you become overwhelmed with pleasure and your mouth drifts from his cock. If you can keep a hand on it, stroking hum as you cum, that’s great, but if you can’t, it’s not a big deal either. Just remember to return the favor once you’ve calmed down and don’t get shitty if his lips fall from yours as he cums down your throat.
  8. Have Him Start First. If you’re anxious, or if it takes you longer than him to get warmed up, have him go down on you before you start 69ing. That way when it’s time for you to roll up on top, you’re already randy and ready to go. This also means you’ll be more into the position, more into getting pleasure, and more into licking his cock. It’s a win-win situation.
  9. Use Your Hands. Really ladies, if you aren’t already using your hands when you’re going down on your guy, you, and he, are missing out. Learn how to lengthen the stroke of your mouth with your hand and sucking his dick suddenly gets much, much better. Using your hands is important, especially in 69ing. That way when you’re so overcome with cumming and you can’t breathe with him in your  mouth, you can still pleasure him with your hands. And vice verse.
  10. Have Fun. Remember what it’s all about. It’s about feeling good and having fun. If 69ing stresses you out so much you need a Xanax, well then don’t worry about it. But if you’re just a little hesitant and unsure, then find a good looking partner and head to the bedroom. Relax, have fun, and lick some hard cock. What more could you ask for?

Although 69ing isn’t for everyone, I hope these ten hints and tips help you relax and give the position a chance. You never know, it may just become one of your favorite things too.

What about you? Are you like me and love 69ing? Or do you think the position is completely over rated?

Dear Lynn: When Words Fail Me

It’s both frustrating and odd, these rare moments when words fail me. It seems as though the words, they’re swimming, crawling to get out, swarming in my mind, wanting nothing more than to make their way out into the world and become words on paper, but they fail to do so.

So instead of writing, I’m just going to talk to you, like you’re here in front of me, and say all the things I want to write, if only my words would let me.

I’m sorry if that seems weird.

Can I tell you how damn sexy you are? How lucky I am, we are, to have a friend like you?

It’s been so fun, this thing we’re doing. And hot. So fucking hot. Memories pop up unexpectedly, little gifts from the recesses of my mind, and I find myself smiling stupidly, thinking about you. About us.

And M, he knows. He’ll see me, staring off into space, lost in thought and ask, with a smile, what I’m thinking about.

What am I thinking about? Christ. So many different things.

Things like the heat surrounding my fingers when they’re inside you. It’s so warm and it feels so good. And when you start bucking against me, grinding and riding it out, I just want more and want to give you more. I want to go deeper inside you, fill you fuller, stretch you tighter.

The taste of you in my mouth. Fuck. You probably don’t know this, but there were multiple times, so many times, when I was between your legs, licking your delicious pussy, and the feel of you in my mouth, your clit between my lips, the sight of you withering on the bed, thrashing… Damn, girl, it made me cum again and again. I literally had a puddle beneath me because going down on you made me squirt so many times.

And 69ing with you, it’s given me a whole new perspective into the joys of a woman’s anatomy. The sight of you, spread open above me, wet and waiting. It was seriously one of the most erotic sights I’ve ever had the pleasure of witnessing.

And although I didn’t mention anything, I was worried. I wasn’t sure I was really ready. I was afraid it would bother me, you and him, and that I wouldn’t truly be able to handle seeing him inside of you.

But I was wrong.

It’s hard to explain, but it was fucking amazing. I loved watching, tasting you between his strokes, you open and wanting. I loved guiding his cock to your pussy and watching you take him in. I’d reach down and feel where you two met, feel your wetness on his cock, feel him sliding into you, feel the tightness of your lips where you stretched around his girth.

I didn’t want it to end.

And it may sound dirty, but I have to tell you, it turns me on to lay on the sheets, lay where we fucked, where we came. Lay on the wet spot you created and remember. Remember what you felt like, on my body, on my hands, on my mouth. Remember how good your pussy tastes and how you sound when you cum. Remember what you look like, above me, below me, fucking me, fucking him.

I lay there and remember and all I want to do is touch myself and think of the dirty, dirty things I want to do to you.